Jesus For Congress?
|Just a few more days and then we can return to our regular diet of commercials for little blue pills, feminine hygiene products, and the latest gadgets you can get for only $19.99 plus shipping and handling.|
But wait, there’s more!
That’s right. Before you can experience that return to nether land and enjoy a sweeps month of no reruns of your favorite shows, you have to endure one last week of campaign ads, all aimed at convincing you that everyone running for office is either:
A. a sleaze ball
B. a thief, murderer, or child molester
C. a commie, socialist, pinko, gun hating Godless idiot
D. an extremely estreme extremist or
E. all of the above
It’s a wonder anyone would want to serve when to get elected, you must subject yourself to the most heinous character assignations imaginable.
Valerie Dixon, writing in the On Faith column of the Washington Post recently, wondered how Jesus might fare if he were running for office in any of the most competitive districts across the United States next Tuesday.
See what you think as he imagines what types of commercials His opponent might run.
On foreign policy:
Scene: A shot of the World Trade Center towers falling.
Voiceover: 9/11. The nation suffers the worst attack on its soil in history. But Jesus says that we ought to love the people who did this. He says: "do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who misuse and persecute you." (Matthew 5:44) Love al Qaeda? Do good to the people who attacked us? This is no plan to keep us safe. Jesus. Soft on defense. Wrong for America.
On guilt by association:
Scene: Nighttime on a city corner where prostitutes and drug dealers are doing business. Cut to Jesus having dinner with the same people.
Voice: People are known by the company they keep. Jesus is friend to prostitutes, drug dealers, tax collectors. Is this the kind of man we want in the United States Senate? Jesus. He's just not one of us.
On family values:
Scene: Children outside playing in the yard, happy and carefree. The father is washing the car while the mother watches from the kitchen window. Everyone is happy and contented.
Voice: Strong families are the backbone of America. Faith and family are what make this country strong.
Next scene: Father and son are screaming at each other. A daughter stomps out of the room, slams the door and leaves the mother looking lost and bewildered.
Voice: But Jesus wants families to be at war with each other. He said: "For I have come to set a man against his father, a daughter against her mother and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; and a man's enemies will be those of his own household." (Matthew 10: 35-36) Is this what we want for our families? Is war in our homes a family value? Keep Jesus in Nazareth and in the carpenter's shop. We do not need him in Washington.
On Jesus' patriotism:
Scene: Jesus is speaking to a large audience. He says: "Woe to you, Chorazin! Woe to you Bethsaida! For if the mighty works which were done in you had been done in Tyre and Sidon, they would have repented long ago in sackcloth and ashes. But I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Tyre and Sidon in the Day of Judgment than for you." (Matthew 11: 21-22)
Voice: Why does Jesus hate America? Do we really want someone who hates his country so much making laws for us? Real America, tell Jesus no on Election Day.
Scene: A scene from the movie Dr. Zhivago when he comes home from the war to find strangers living in his house. The woman says there was room for many families here. Freeze frame.
Voice: Karl Marx says that the government ought to take from each according to his abilities, and give to each according to his needs. This is socialism. This is communism. Jesus agrees with Marx. He says to be saved, you have to give your hard-earned possessions away. He said: "Go and sell whatever you have and give it to the poor and you will have treasure in heaven."(Mark 10: 21) Jesus. Socialism. Dangerous for America.